Diesel (BBW Paranormal Shapeshifter Romance) (The Grizzly Brothers Book 1) Read online

  “Ugh,” Reagan grumbled. “Why can’t you just spill?”

  “Look, it’s not like it matters anyway, right? He hasn’t exactly been beating down the door to win me back,” Sadie muttered, voicing what had really been bothering her over the last few days. “I mean, seriously, who says you’re their soul mate, then disappears when you don’t believe their bullshit? A liar, that’s who.”

  “Just say it out loud, Sadie, I think you’ll be surprised at my reaction,” Reagan said, in that same know it all tone that she’d been using since Sadie’d gotten involved with Diesel.

  “Why don’t you just say it out loud, if you know so much…”

  “Fine,” her sister said as she pulled in her oar and laid it down in the boat. “It isn’t my secret to tell, but since I’m pretty sure that Diesel already told you, and based on your reaction you didn’t believe him, maybe it will help coming from me.”

  “What?” Sadie asked, daring her sister to say it, even though she didn’t know if her brain could handle it if Reagan confirmed Diesel’s crazy story.

  Like a Band-Aid, Reagan let it rip.

  “When I moved to Alaska I found out, much to my disbelief, that the paranormal is real. Shifters live in this world and are predominant members of my community. They live with us, work with us, and love, just like us.”

  When Sadie’s mouth dropped open, but no sound came out, Reagan kept talking.

  “I met Hunter first, then Blaze, and although I’d never actually spoken to Diesel before that day in my cabin, I’d heard about him and knew what he was… What they all are. Grizzlies. Hunter, Blaze, and Diesel are from the same litter and, as you know, are triplets, although, I hear they look less alike as bears than they do as humans.”

  “You can’t be serious,” Sadie exclaimed.

  “I am.”

  “You’ve seen these bears?”

  “I work with a couple of brown bear shifters, and even dated a black bear shifter before, but I’ve not seen the Grizzly brothers in bear form. They’re very private, and although Diesel prefers his grizzly form, I don’t think Hunter and Blaze shift more than they have to.”

  “I can’t believe that you believe all of this,” Sadie said, and she knew she was looking at her sister like Reagan was crazy.

  “Look, Sadie, I know it seems inconceivable, especially coming from where we do, but you trust me, I know you do. This is real.”

  Reagan tapped her oar on the bottom of the boat to get Sadie to look back at her.

  “Everything Diesel told you is true. He’s never been with a woman, never dated. Out of the three, Diesel is the most in tune with his bear, so he’s been waiting for his mate. For whatever reason, he says that is you, and I have to tell you, Sadie, that when a bear mates, they mate for life. If you two are mates like he claims, then he will never love anyone but you.”

  Sadie thought about Diesel, how kind and gentle, yet domineering and assertive he was. The way it felt when they touched, when they kissed, she knew that she hadn’t imagined their connection.

  Still, what Reagan was saying, what Diesel had told her, it was just too fantastical to be real, wasn’t it?

  “If that’s true, then where is he?” Sadie asked. “If I’m the love of his life, why did he walk away so easily?”

  “Hunter said he went by Diesel’s house and it looks like he’s been gone this whole time. He must have shifted after dropping you off and hasn’t changed back yet. Diesel has always been more of a bear than a man, and I’m sure he’s just off licking his wounds.”

  “I don’t know…”

  “Just give him another chance, Sadie. I know it’s a lot to take in, but let him show you that he’s telling you the truth. If he’s really your soul mate, you’ll never be happy with anyone else either.”

  “You really believe that?”

  “Well, I haven’t experienced it for myself, but, yeah,” Reagan admitted. “I watched my coworkers find each other, and seeing them together, I can believe that two people can be destined to be together.”

  “Okay,” Sadie said with a sharp nod. “Let’s go.”

  “What, now?”

  “Yeah, let’s go find him. I need answers once and for all. But, Reagan, if this is all some big joke or prank, or something, I’m going back to Chicago and never coming back.”

  They rowed back to shore, pulled the kayak out of the water and stowed it, then hopped in Reagan’s truck and headed toward Diesel’s. As they neared his house, Sadie saw Hunter and Blaze sitting on the porch, but no sign of their brother.

  “Hey,” Hunter called as they got out of the truck. “What are you guys doing here? I think you’ve done enough damage, don’t you?”

  This he aimed at Sadie, who was surprised at the level of anger in the normally laid back man’s voice.

  “Don’t talk to my sister like that,” Reagan said, getting toe to toe with the handsome brother.

  “He has a point,” Blaze said as he came toward them. “Diesel took off because of her close-mindedness. Maybe you can wait until he gets home and calms down, before coming back to start shit back up.”

  “That’s not fair,” Sadie began, and when Blaze put a hand on her arm and began pulling her back toward the truck, she dug her heels in. “Let me go!”

  Sadie no sooner yelled the words, when a terrible roar lit up the air, and she turned to see the massive grizzly from that day on the road come barreling toward them. She froze, much as she had that first day.

  Blaze dropped his hand and took a step away from her.

  “I wasn’t hurting her, D, calm down,” Blaze said, his tone soothing.

  Sadie watched in shock as the bear dropped down onto all fours and walked slowly toward her. Her heart was pounding painfully in her chest as adrenaline coursed through her, but then she looked into the grizzly’s eyes, and her heart stopped.

  Diesel’s chocolate brown eyes were staring back at her.

  That was when she dropped to the ground and she passed out.

  Again.

  Fourteen

  Diesel

  Diesel shifted and dropped to his knees, his hand reaching out to stroke the hair off of Sadie’s forehead.

  “You don’t touch her,” he said, his voice low and hard. He couldn’t even look at his brother, for fear that he would shift again out of pure rage.

  “I wasn’t hurting her, brother, I was only trying to get her to leave.”

  Diesel’s head came up, his eyes taking in the face that mirrored his own.

  “Never put your hands on her again.”

  “I won’t, bro, promise,” Blaze said, raising his hands up to cement his words.

  “Is she okay?” Reagan asked from behind Hunter.

  Diesel wasn’t sure if his brother was shielding her from him, or trying to block out his nakedness, but he couldn’t care. All he cared about was getting his mate inside and making sure she was comfortable and safe.

  Much like the day they’d met, Diesel lifted her lax body into his arms and carried her into his cabin. Once she was back in his bed, he turned to put some pants on, then went out to confront their siblings.

  “What are you all doing here?” he asked the trio who were waiting in his living room.

  “We’ve been stopping in every day to see if you’d come back,” Hunter explained. “We were worried when we came by the other day and found your keys in your truck.”

  “Sadie and I had come by to see if you were back because she wanted to talk to you,” Reagan put in, then asked, “Is she still out?”

  Diesel nodded, then said, “I appreciate you all being worried about me, but Sadie and I need to be alone to talk. So… leave.”

  Hunter and Blaze grinned at each other, then started for the door, while Reagan complained, “But…”

  “Reagan,” Diesel began, trying his best to keep calm. “I know she’s your sister and you’re just looking out for her. But she’s my mate, and we need to get things settled. I promise, if she wants to leave, I�
�ll bring her back to you.”

  Reagan nodded slowly, gave one last look toward the room he’d left Sadie in, then followed his brothers out the door.

  Diesel checked on Sadie, then went to his kitchen to make coffee and prepare some food. He remembered that last time she’d slept for a while, she’d woken up hungry, and since he’d been gone for so long and stayed in his bear form for days, he was ravenous himself.

  He’d just put the finishing touches on the fresh fish his brothers had left in his refrigerator, and a berry spinach salad, when he heard a sound coming from the doorway.

  Diesel turned his head to see Sadie standing there, watching him, her eyes wide.

  “Hey,” she said softly, as she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

  “Hi,” he replied, wanting to go to her, but not sure if he should. “You hungry?”

  Sadie nodded and padded into the room.

  Diesel gestured for her to sit, then filled two plates and took them to the table.

  They sat in silence while they ate. Diesel tried to think of the best thing to say, the best way to start their conversation back up, but after Sadie’s reaction the last few times they’d been together, he was worried about getting it wrong again.

  “Are you, uh, okay?” Sadie asked, breaking the silence first.

  “Sure, why wouldn’t I be?” Diesel asked, confused.

  “Well, I know you took off after the last time we talked, and I know you were upset.” Sadie brought her big blue eyes up to look at his face and said, “I guess you’ve been telling the truth this whole time. I’m sorry I didn’t believe you.”

  “It’s a lot to take on faith,” Diesel assured her. “I’ve been around enough humans to know that most of you have been shielded from our part in this world. I don’t blame you for being skeptical, but I do wish you’d given me the opportunity to show you that I was telling the truth.”

  Sadie dipped her head sadly and repeated, “I’m sorry.”

  “That’s okay, you’re here now,” he said with a grin.

  “Can you tell me all of it?” she asked. “What you’re hoping for, what you expect from me, what I should expect from you?”

  Diesel put down his fork and clasped his hands on the table.

  “Our parents were both bear shifters, and although they mated, were never actual mates. My father never claimed my mother. In fact, he left shortly after he impregnated her, and was never heard from again. Hunter, Blaze, and I were in the same litter, and our mother raised us until we were eight, and then she was killed,” Diesel paused, as he always did when he thought of his mother. “Typically, when we find our true mate, we are mated for life. I’m sorry that my mother never found that, but I’ve always known that I’d find mine. That I’d find you.”

  “How can you be sure it’s me?” Sadie asked, obviously struggling to comprehend what he was saying, even though she now knew he was telling the truth.

  “I knew the moment I met you that there was something different about you, then, when we touched in the kitchen, I felt the connection. Everything after that only solidified the fact that you’re my mate. The magic when we kissed, the way you respond to my touch, and being one with you… I’ve never felt anything so right in my life. We are two halves of one whole, destined to live this life together. I know it with everything I am.”

  “That’s beautiful,” Sadie said, her eyes welling with unshed tears.

  Diesel reached his hand across the table.

  “You feel it too,” he said, needing her to admit it.

  “Yes,” she replied sweetly, her breath catching on the word.

  “I want you to stay here with me. Live with me, marry me, have my cubs, all of it, and I’ll spend the rest of my life worshiping you and making you happy.”

  “We’ve only just met,” Sadie argued. “I feel what you’re feeling, I just don’t know if I can give everything up and move here after only knowing you a week. It goes against everything I was taught.”

  “I understand,” Diesel said, although it felt like his heart was splintering in his chest. “Think about it. I’ll support any decision you make, but you must know, you’re the only one for me, and I’ll love you until my last breath.”

  Fifteen

  Sadie

  She was confused. Torn. Her brain unwilling to come to the conclusion that her heart wanted it to make.

  Sadie stood and walked around the table to where Diesel was looking up at her. She couldn’t give him the answer he wanted right then, but she could show him how she felt. Prove that she felt the magic in his touch, just as he did.

  The chair scraped against the floor as he pushed back and turned so his body was facing hers, his eyes locked on her, watching her every movement.

  With more confidence than she’d ever felt in her life, Sadie stripped herself in front of him. Not just the clothes on her body, but she laid herself completely bare before him. Open and eager to give herself fully to this beautiful beast of a man.

  He kept his hands on his thighs as she peeled first her sweater and then her pants from her body, leaving herself in a black and white bra and panty set with little flowers adorning the scraps of satin.

  Sadie felt a rush of power at the darkening of his gaze and the deep, shallow breaths that he took. Feeding off that power, she ran her hands slowly, seductively up her thighs and over her belly, then cupped her breasts and lifted, squeezing them together to offer up her cleavage.

  Diesel’s eyes got heavy as she reached around to unclasp her bra, then let it fall off and drop to the floor at her feet. Breasts bared to him, Sadie pinched her nipples roughly as she kneaded her full, tender breasts with her palms.

  She moaned and licked her lips, and saw Diesel clench his fists as he forced himself to watch without touching.

  Heady from control, Sadie slid her hands back down her stomach and cupped herself over her panties. She gasped as her hand glided over her sensitive clit and felt the wet satin. She stepped out to part her legs and gain better access, then kept her eyes locked on Diesel’s face as he watched her dip her hand inside the scrap of material.

  A deep growl erupted from his chest as she fingered herself, which only heightened her arousal and made her wetter.

  With one hand in her panties and the other on her breast, Sadie worked herself into a frenzy until Diesel could take no more.

  One second Sadie was close to getting herself off, and the next, she was picked up and tossed over Diesel’s shoulder, and they were heading to his room.

  Sadie squealed as she landed on the bed, then watched as Diesel kicked off his sweatpants and stood naked before her, his cock hard and ready. She quickly slid off her panties and laid back on the bed, then held her hands out in invitation.

  Diesel knelt at the foot of the bed and started at her feet. Lifting one leg, then the other, and kissing his way up, up, up, until his mouth fused on her pussy and he began to give her a new kind of French kiss.

  She tossed her head back and moaned as she writhed beneath him, then one of his fingers filled her, and she began to buck.

  “Diesel,” Sadie managed when his finger began to fuck her as he flicked her clit with his tongue. She felt the orgasm building and begged, “Come inside me.”

  Diesel must have been as ready to be in her as she was to have him there, because he rose above her and spread her legs further apart to settle himself between them. Then, as he eased inside ever so slowly, he lowered his head and kissed her reverently.

  Sadie wrapped her legs around his thick waist, and her arms around his neck, then lifted her hips so he could fill her more deeply, and kissed him back with everything she had.

  They stayed that way, joined at the hips while he took his time thrusting in and out of her. It was beautiful, like floating blissfully toward something amazing, and when she came, Sadie cried out in his mouth and fisted her hand in his hair.

  She opened her eyes just in time to see Diesel reach his release, then, when she saw the question in
his eyes, Sadie nodded. Diesel pulled out and flipped her onto her stomach, before slamming into her again.

  Sadie tipped up her ass and got up on all fours. Seconds later, she felt his teeth on the back of her shoulder as he claimed her. She cried out as she came harder than she ever had in her life, then dropped her torso to the pillows as she face planted, breathing as if she’d just completed a marathon.

  Diesel’s tongue lathed the mark on her back, then she smiled when he kissed her gently there. He turned her slowly, falling onto his back and tucking her into his side. Then he did the damndest thing.

  He started to make a contented sound in the back of his throat, much like a purr.

  Sadie snuggled into his side, drowsy with satisfaction, then dropped off to sleep. When she woke some time later, it was dark, and Diesel was snoring softly.

  She eased herself off of the bed and went into the kitchen to gather her clothes. As she dressed, she thought about what her next course of action should be.

  Should she go back to Reagan’s?

  Stay here with Diesel and see what life would be like if she lived with him?

  Or go back to Chicago, get some clarity with distance, and figure out if she was willing to give it all up for a chance at love?

  Tears filled her eyes as she came to a decision, and although Sadie wasn’t sure Diesel would forgive her, she left without a backward glance, intent on finding her sister and getting a ride to the airport.

  Sixteen

  Diesel

  To say he’d been upset when he woke up after claiming Sadie, only to find that she’d left in the night, would be a gross understatement.

  He’d thrown things. Broken shit. And broken his own rule by shifting in his cabin, only to find more busted shit when he shifted back.

  He’d run. Roamed. Slept.

  But none of it changed the fact that she’d gone.

  Diesel had spent the better part of a week dodging his brothers and trying to find Reagan in hopes of getting some insight into where Sadie’s mind had been when she’d left. He hadn’t been successful in either.